The brutal truth: Beauty and its Beast

It’s one thing to ask the universe for amazing things, but it’s another to be truly ready for what you ask for. In my last post I shared two of my goals for the year as I work on a better, stronger me. I think an important element in sharing positive goals is also sharing the hard work, struggles, tears and sweat that go into making them a reality.

I work very hard for the life I have, and I know you do too. One of my big goals is working on an internal transformation which I have started by practicing hot yoga. Wonderful. A beautiful side affect is a transformation externally as well. As a professional dancer, I have always been, and been made, aware of body image, weight, shape, height, how I carry myself, and how I look when I move. It’s a tough business that has nonstop roadblocks and adversities. If you can overcome the negative feedback, the very often no feedback, and your own inner-monologue, YOU ARE ON THE ROAD TO SUCCESS. Oh, sooooo easy… In order to face the world and sometimes battle, I know that strength starts with me! Enter New Year’s goal.

Let me share this exert from LA Times writer, David Akert: “Singers, Musicians, Dancers and Actors, are some of the most driven, courageous people on the face of the earth. They deal with more day-to-day rejection in one year than most people do in a lifetime. Every day, they face the financial challenge of living a freelance lifestyle, the disrespect of people who think they should get real jobs, and their own fear that they’ll never work again. Every day, they have to ignore the possibility that the vision they have dedicated their lives to is a pipe dream. With every note, they stretch themselves, emotionally and physically, risking criticism and judgment. With every passing year, many of them watch as the other people their age achieve the predictable milestones of normal life – the car, the family, the house, the nest egg. Why? Because Actors, Dancers, Musicians and Singers are willing to give their entire lives to a moment – to that melody, that lyric, that chord, or that interpretation that will stir the audience’s soul. Actors, Dancers, Singers and Musicians are beings who have tasted life’s nectar in that crystal moment when they poured out their creative spirit and touched another’s heart. In that instant, they were as close to magic, God, and perfection as anyone could ever be. And in their own hearts, they know that to dedicate oneself to that moment is worth a thousand lifetimes.”

The strength to endure always begins with you. Whether it is heartache, profession, bullies, a race, a competition, or the mirror, the value you give yourself sets the tone for all your achievements. Yesterday I worked 8.5 hours at my day job, came home to change, and went to a hot power yoga class. I ridiculed myself for what the scale read, for how I felt, and how I looked. I went to bed guilty for eating dinner. I share this with you because it is one thing to spread positivity, but it is another to share your truth. I am on a beautiful journey with ups and downs. I chose “an internal transformation” as a goal for myself because I need one. I respect the process, but I need to respect myself as well. I feel a bit freer sharing this honesty, and I wish you the honesty to develop something in yourself too.

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